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Understanding God’s Heart for the Abused

God wants us to:

Acknowledge the problem

Then he said to Tamar, “Now bring the food into my bedroom and feed it to me here.” So Tamar took his favorite dish to him. But as she was feeding him, he grabbed her and demanded, “Come to bed with me, my darling sister.” “No, my brother!” she cried. “Don’t be foolish! Don’t do this to me! Such wicked things aren’t done in Israel. Where could I go in my shame? And you would be called one of the greatest fools in Israel. Please, just speak to the king about it, and he will let you marry me.” But Amnon wouldn’t listen to her, and since he was stronger than she was, he raped her. Then suddenly Amnon’s love turned to hate, and he hated her even more than he had loved her. “Get out of here!” he snarled at her. 2 SAMUEL 13:10 NLT

Create a safe place for healing

Her brother Absalom saw her and asked, “Is it true that Amnon has been with you? Well, my sister, keep quiet for now, since he’s your brother. Don’t you worry about it.” So Tamar lived as a desolate woman in her brother Absalom’s house. 2 SAMUEL 13:20 NLT

We listen

… the wise listen to others. PROVERBS 12:15

We report

Love … does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. 1 CORINTHIANS 13:6 NLT

We offer support

Brothers and sisters … Encourage those who are timid. Take tender care of those who are weak. Be patient with everyone. 1 THESSALONIANS 5:14 NLT

Bring them to Jesus

Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. MATTHEW 11:28-29 NLT
The abused don’t just need healing they need the healer
He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there will be no more death or sorrow or crying or pain. All these things are gone forever.” And the one sitting on the throne said, “Look, I am making everything new!” REVELATION 21:4-5 NLT

Warn the guilty and _protect the innocent _

But if you cause one of these little ones who trusts in me to fall into sin, it would be better for you to have a large millstone tied around your neck and be drowned in the depths of the sea. What sorrow awaits the world, because it tempts people to sin. Temptations are inevitable, but what sorrow awaits the person who does the tempting. So if your hand or foot causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It’s better to enter eternal life with only one hand or one foot than to be thrown into eternal fire with both of your hands and feet. MATTHEW 18:6-8 NLT

Community Group Discussion Guide

(Note to leaders: Please review the Group Leader Do’s and Don’ts before group.)
1. What specific steps can your group take to make sure your group is a safe place where people can share their deepest pain?
2. Read Psalm 34:18. What does this passage tell us about God’s heart for those who have been abused?
3. Read Matthew 11:28-29. What are you holding onto that makes experiencing rest with God so difficult?
4. If you have suffered, how has Jesus been instrumental in your healing?
5. What role have people played in helping you heal?
6. Read Revelation 21:4-5. How does the fact that Jesus will make all things new encourage you in light of the great pain people suffer?
To find the next step in your healing, go to to connect with Soul Care.

Personal Reflection Guide

Find a quiet place where you can be alone with God. Spend a few moments reflecting on your past. What pain have you experienced, what abuse have you suffered or seen someone suffer? Ask God to join you where you are at and talk to him about your grief, your anger, and your pain let him share them with you. Now read through Revelation 21:4-5, a few times, slowly. How does it impact you to know that Jesus suffers with you and will someday make you new? As you move through your week, pay attention to ways God meets you in your suffering or invites you to enter into the suffering of another; offering them compassion, grace and mercy.

My Notes