“There was a man named Nicodemus, a Jewish religious leader who was a Pharisee. After dark one evening, he came to speak with Jesus. “Rabbi,” he said, “we all know that God has sent you to teach us. Your miraculous signs are evidence that God is with you.” Jesus replied, “I tell you the truth, unless you are born again, you cannot see the Kingdom of God.” “What do you mean?” exclaimed Nicodemus. “How can an old man go back into his mother’s womb and be born again?” Jesus replied, “I assure you, no one can enter the Kingdom of God without being born of water and the Spirit. Humans can reproduce only human life, but the Holy Spirit gives birth to spiritual life. So don’t be surprised when I say, ‘You must be born again.’ The wind blows wherever it wants. Just as you can hear the wind but can’t tell where it comes from or where it is going, so you can’t explain how people are born of the Spirit.” “How are these things possible?” Nicodemus asked. Jesus replied, “You are a respected Jewish teacher, and yet you don’t understand these things? I assure you, we tell you what we know and have seen, and yet you won’t believe our testimony. But if you don’t believe me when I tell you about earthly things, how can you possibly believe if I tell you about heavenly things? No one has ever gone to heaven and returned. But the Son of Man has come down from heaven. And as Moses lifted up the bronze snake on a pole in the wilderness, so the Son of Man must be lifted up, so that everyone who believes in him will have eternal life. “For this is how God loved the world: He gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life.” JOHN 3:1-16 NLT
The Observer:
Reflects: God’s wisdom
“Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God.” COLOSSIANS 3:16 ESV
Underlying Emotion: Fear
Motivations:
- Gain knowledge
- Uncover truth
- Avoid incompetence
When healthy:
Observers have the ability to remain calm and focused in decisions and processing.
Observers are often very thoughtful and their knowledge in multiple areas makes them incredibly perceptive.
Observers are insightful, observant, and desire the world to be a less chaotic and more organized place.
When unhealthy:
Observers can shift from being observant to detached
Core Sin: Greed
- Time
- Emotions
- Knowledge
- Money
So that your faith might not rest in the wisdom of men but in the power of God.” 1 CORINTHIANS 2:5 NLT
“So that through the church the manifold wisdom of God might now be made known to the rulers and authorities in the heavenly places.” EPHESIANS 3:10 NLT
When healthy, the Observer is always in pursuit of generosity
“With him came Nicodemus, the man who had come to Jesus at night. He brought about seventy-five pounds of perfumed ointment made from myrrh and aloes. Following Jewish burial custom, they wrapped Jesus’ body with the spices in long sheets of linen cloth.” JOHN 19:39-40 NLT
“Remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how he himself said, ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’” ACTS 20:35 ESV
How the Observer can be real with Self:
Get out of your head and in touch with your feelings
How the Observer can be real with Others:
“He who separates himself seeks his own desire, He quarrels against all sound wisdom.” PROVERBS 18:1 NASB
“If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him.”
JAMES 1:5 ESV
How the Observer can be real with God:
“always learning and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth.” 2 TIMOTHY 3:7 NASB
How to love an Observer:
- Acknowledge their need for personal space and time.
- Express how much it means to you when they engage.
- Don’t criticize how they have fun
- Utilize their knowledge and wisdom
Prayer for the Observer:
God help me to connect my heart to yours. Help me to feel more deeply and to embrace the mystery of who you are. Help me to have grace for people who are incompetent and change my heart on community groups!
My Notes
Personal Reflection Guide
Take a few deep breaths to quiet yourself, allowing yourself to become calm. Consider the ways you connect to God and others. Especially if you are an Observer, ask God how well you are connecting to him and others with your heart as well as your mind. To what extent are you in touch with your feelings? Ask God, “What’s a recent incident in which you demonstrated your wisdom through me? What were my feelings regarding the situation? Did I connect with the person or persons only through my head and not my heart? How can I connect better to you and others from the heart?” Ask God to impress upon you one action he wants you to take his week to engage with him or someone else from the heart. What will that action be and how do you feel about taking it? Write your thoughts in the space below, and share with the group the highlights of your reflection time if you feel comfortable.
Discussion Questions
- LEADER’S NOTE: Take the first five to ten minutes of group time to have everyone do the Personal Reflection Gude (linked in the sermon notes). You may want to set a timer, play some soft music, etc. Once you notice people finishing up, transition to group discussion time with a short prayer, then open by asking people to share what that experience was like, if they feel comfortable.
- REAL WITH SELF: Where do you find yourself in conflict between your head and your heart. Take a minute and focus on what you feel about those specific issues. What do these feelings reveal in you about what you trust to be true about that issue?
- REAL WITH SELF: In what ways do you find yourself withholding from people, either with your time, emotions, money, or knowledge? What’s motivating that in you?
- REAL WITH GOD: Take a minute or two and imagine being in the presence of God as he looks at you with love and acceptance. What feelings surface? What do your feelings reveal about how you view God? Are they consistent with what you know from Scripture? Praise him for who he is, filtering your feelings through the truth of the Bible.
- REAL WITH OTHERS: Think of the Observers you know. In what way have they reflected the wisdom of God to you and others?
- REAL WITH OTHERS: Consider those in your group who reflect God’s wisdom to you. Share with them about a specific time when they did that and what it meant to you.
- TAKE ACTION: Slowly read James 1:5 several times through, leaving space for quiet reflection. As you do, ask God to show you an opportunity to become more involved in the lives of others. Share it with your group. Again, leave time for quiet reflection to allow what you’ve shared to settle in with others. Then, ask the Observers in your group to share what God has shown them regarding some of these possibilities and how they could benefit you and the people involved.