Now Adam had sexual relations with his wife, Eve, and she became pregnant. When she gave birth to Cain, she said, “With the LORD’s help, I have produced a man!” Later she gave birth to his brother and named him Abel. When they grew up, Abel became a shepherd, while Cain cultivated the ground. When it was time for the harvest, Cain presented some of his crops as a gift to the LORD. Abel also brought a gift—the best portions of the firstborn lambs from his flock. The LORD accepted Abel and his gift, but he did not accept Cain and his gift. This made Cain very angry, and he looked dejected. “Why are you so angry?” the LORD asked Cain. “Why do you look so dejected? You will be accepted if you do what is right. But if you refuse to do what is right, then watch out! Sin is crouching at the door, eager to control you. But you must subdue it and be its master.” One day Cain suggested to his brother, “Let’s go out into the fields.” And while they were in the field, Cain attacked his brother, Abel, and killed him. GENESIS 4:1-8 NLT

God values every human life

You shall not murder. EXODUS 20:13 ESV

Why do we kill?

We are not aware of our emotions

You desire but do not have, so you kill. JAMES 4:2 NLT

We are not aware of the danger of our anger

And “don’t sin by letting anger control you.” Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry, for anger gives a foothold to the devil. EPHESIANS 4:26 NLT

How do we kill?

Physically, with our actions

When an ox gores a man or a woman to death, the ox shall be stoned, and its flesh shall not be eaten, but the owner of the ox shall not be liable. But if the ox has been accustomed to gore in the past, and its owner has been warned but has not kept it in, and it kills a man or a woman, the ox shall be stoned, and its owner also shall be put to death. Exodus 21:28-29 NLT

Emotionally, with our words

“You have heard that it was said to the people long ago, ‘Do not murder, and anyone who murders will be subject to judgment.’ But I tell you that anyone who is angry with his brother will be subject to judgment. Again, anyone who says to his brother, ‘Raca,’ is answerable to the Sanhedrin. But anyone who says, ‘You fool!’ will be in danger of the fire of hell.” MATTHEW 5:21-22 NLT
What we say kills who they are: Reputation
What we say kills who they can be: Potential

We must protect life with our actions

I will not tolerate people who slander their neighbors. PSALM 101:5 NLT
Wrongdoers eagerly listen to gossip; liars pay close attention to slander. PROVERBS 17:4 NLT

We must give life with our words

All spoke well of him and were amazed at the gracious words that came from his lips. “Isn’t this Joseph’s son?” they asked. LUKE 4:22 NLT
If I speak in human or angelic tongues, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 1 CORINTHIANS 13:1 NLT
You are already clean because of the word I have spoken to you. JOHN 15:3 NLT

Community Group Discussion Guide

1. Cain killed his brother, someone he was supposed to love. How is accumulated anger “killing” the people you love?
2. Cain seems unaware of his emotions that are about to overtake him. Do your emotions ever catch you by surprise?
3. How can we identify and express our anger in a way that does not give the devil a foothold on our life?
4. Read Exodus 21:28-29. How are you often careless with people’s lives through your words or actions? What needs to change?
5. How has your personal sense of worth or identity been killed by someone’s words?
6. Are your words to others more life-giving, or life-taking? What steps can you take to speak more life-giving words this week?
7. What words do you wish were spoken over you as a child?
8. How could you speak those words to people you know now?
9. ON YOUR OWN: Take some time this week to confess any hatred in your heart by accessing the Real Confessions exercise on the Sandals Church app.

Personal Reflection Guide

Take time to sit with God in the quiet for a few minutes to better absorb the message you heard today. Say no to all the distractions that attempt to pry you away from solitude with God. Do not be afraid to face what you may need to confront about murder. Whether you resonate with the teaching about Cain and Abel in the way of actual murder, or you resonate with the teaching about murdering in your heart through hate or with your words, get real with God about the struggle.
Through confession and repentance we find restoration. God wants to restore us even if we are guilty of murder. Read Matthew 5:21-22 a couple times through. Those verses give us insight into the reality that God sees anger and hatred in the heart as a serious offense and a sin that needs to be dealt with. Anger and the desire to do damage to someone physically or mar a reputation are problems of the heart. As we recognize the parts of our hearts that need God’s touch, invite him into those places; ask him to help you rid your heart of any anger or hatred that is causing you to sin. James 5:16 says, “confess your sins to one another, pray for one another that you might be healed.” Perhaps you need to confess your current struggle to someone and be prayed for to find healing.
For anyone struggling with the aftermath of an abortion, don’t suffer alone, we have people who can help you navigate this issue. We love you and are here for you. Find someone to talk to at move.sc/soulcare