How To Pray through Forgiveness

This, then, is how you should pray: “‘Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us today our daily bread. And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one. For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins. MATTHEW 6:9-15 NIV

As I learn to pray, I discover there is more forgiveness in God than there is sin in me

In prayer…

We release both the debt others owe us and the grip anger has on our hearts

…as we also have forgiven our debtors. MATTHEW 6:12b NIV

And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. Follow God’s example, therefore, as dearly loved children and walk in the way of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God. EPHESIANS 4:30-5:2 NIV

Forgiveness is not forgetting
Forgiveness is not just a feeling
Forgiveness doesn’t mean something is not a sin
Forgiveness is not always allowing someone hurtful back into your life
Forgiveness is not a one time event

We absorb the pain caused by others instead of returning it to them

When they hurled their insults at him, he did not retaliate; when he suffered, he made no threats. Instead, he entrusted himself to him who judges justly. “He himself bore our sins” in his body on the cross, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; “by his wounds you have been healed.” For “you were like sheep going astray,”but now you have returned to the Shepherd and Overseer of your souls. 1 PETER 2:23-25 NIV

We allow forgiveness to transform us rather than bitterness to transmit from us

See to it that no one falls short of the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many. HEBREWS 12:15 NIV

With God’s help, learning to pray can not only heal my wounds, but transform them into a form of healing for others.

What am I angry about?

What areas of unforgiveness do I need to name to God in prayer?

My Notes

Personal Reflection Guide

Take a few moments to still yourself, releasing any of the events or distractions from the day. Ask God to help you be real with yourself and him during this time. As you consider forgiveness, are there any areas in your life where you struggle accepting God’s total forgiveness? Ask God to help you receive his complete forgiveness, possibly asking for the power to forgive yourself if needed. Next, are there any wrongs committed against you that you need to forgive? Ask God for the power to forgive that person so you may experience freedom from the power of anger than can root itself when we do not forgive. Finally, ask God to reveal any areas where your ability to forgive can be a source of healing for others. Who can benefit from hearing your story? From you praying over them? Thank God for his forgiveness for you. Ask God for any reminders that may be needed to bring lingering areas of unforgiveness to your mind and heart, so you can bring them to the cross where Jesus can carry them for you. Thank him for this time and write any reflections in the space below. Share with your group if you feel comfortable.

Discussion Questions

PERSONAL REFLECTION: Begin group time by completing the Personal Reflection Guide, (link found on the top of sermon notes). Use this time to examine any areas of forgiveness that you need to receive (and give). (Tip: playing some soft background music is helpful here!)

REAL WITH SELF: We all have pain that has been caused by other people. What do you tend to do with your pain? How do you respond when you've been hurt?

REAL WITH SELF: One of the ways we can be freed from anger is to “locate it” and ask God to be released from its power. Where are you carrying anger right now? (People, Ourselves, Life, God?) What would it look like to bring God into the process of releasing that anger?

REAL WITH GOD: If you search your heart, is there anger toward God because you sense he has been unfair, silent, or absent? How do you think God would respond if you were to admit that to him?

REAL WITH OTHERS: Read 1 Peter 2:23 (NIV). When we forgive others we break the cycle of sin and choose not to return the pain to others that has been done to us. Is there a specific relationship or way that you can break the cycle of hurt and unforgiveness?

TAKE ACTION: How can your areas of experiencing forgiveness provide healing for others? Perhaps through telling your story, praying with someone, or by gathering as a group to pray for one another? Take some time to do that now.